The romance industry conflates finding love with looking a certain way, and it’s hard even for the strongest of us not to internalize messages about the way we look. And worse, these messages are normalized. Just think of things people say when they are getting ready to date someone: ‘He’s cute,’ ‘He’s short,’ ‘He’s kind of chubby,’ ‘He’s tall and fine.’ Or men: ‘I prefer slender girls,’ ‘I’m not really into fat girls,’ ‘I prefer Asian chicks,’ and on and on. It is completely acceptable to say the most appalling things about the way people look when it comes to dating, and if someone is called out for it, their opinion becomes a matter of ‘preference.’


What gets ignored in calling this level of categorization ‘just preference’ is a history and culture of mainstream advertising that impacts our psychology, causing us to actually want to respond to certain things over others. It’s hardly a coincidence that people are attracted to images of femininity that have been beaten into their psyches….We are taught to prefer certain things over others, and when we repeatedly see the same exaggerated images of femininity and masculinity, we internalize a specific standard of beauty and begin to strive for it unconsciously. Considering the exaggerated nature of these kinds of images, preference is not really a ‘preference’; it is more like a culturally sanctioned fetish.

Samhita Mukhopadhyay, Outdated: Why Dating Is Ruining Your Love Life (via brute-reason)

(Source: brutereason)

  1. kingeddardstark reblogged this from reezistance
  2. bluegirl1359 reblogged this from brutereason
  3. divinityanddust reblogged this from beeftony
  4. juniemond reblogged this from arevhat
  5. arevhat reblogged this from beeftony
  6. victorsierraecho reblogged this from beeftony
  7. sparksel reblogged this from beeftony
  8. vivesarrives reblogged this from beeftony
  9. azure-fallen-angel reblogged this from beeftony
  10. lichnobuea reblogged this from beeftony
  11. beeftony reblogged this from reezistance
  12. reezistance reblogged this from werecutiemalia
  13. mswhittacker reblogged this from imraardeen
  14. werecutiemalia reblogged this from imraardeen
  15. imraardeen reblogged this from brutereason
  16. roswellianphilosophy reblogged this from jessicaaplummer
  17. hello-goodbye-77 reblogged this from jessicaaplummer
  18. foreverraeanne reblogged this from jessicaaplummer
  19. jessicaaplummer reblogged this from ashanti-notthesinger
  20. andsosaidthequeen reblogged this from ashanti-notthesinger
  21. ashanti-notthesinger reblogged this from thechocolatebrigade
  22. yogapig reblogged this from silverstags
  23. rozmaringanne reblogged this from fuckyeahwomenprotesting
  24. wingnutlady reblogged this from nabyss
  25. more-than-this reblogged this from mistyknights
  26. dartangan reblogged this from czaaritsa
  27. foldyoulikeorigami reblogged this from czaaritsa
  28. czaaritsa reblogged this from aloofshahbanou
  29. inthedrft reblogged this from brutereason
  30. eugenesayshey reblogged this from fomohomo
  31. trinityscar reblogged this from original-recipe-winnafish