Tell them that you don’t like the way they are being treated and that you don’t think they deserve it
Tell them you love them and that you think they are a good person
Ask them to read this book, or one of the books listed in the back
Ask them if they would be willing to make plans with you for ways to respond to specific situations. For example, if they’d agree to call you next time their partner started to yell at them. Offer to pay for a night in a hotel the next time their partner gets scary. Ask them if they can stay with you for a bit and clear their head. Brainstorm other ideas with them.
If you ever think they’re in immediate danger, call the police.
Call and write often, even if they never seem to respond (unless they ask you not to, which may indicate their partner is punishing them for communicating with others).
Treat them consistently well. They’ll feel the difference between what you do and what their partner does.
Encourage them to call a program for abused partners, “just to talk.” They can find support, reality checks, and room to vent and describe what’s happening to them.
According to the same book, if you know that they are being abused because they’ve talked to you about it, you need to be the opposite of the abuser. You need to:
-support all the decisions they make, even ones you don’t like or don’t think you wouldn’t do (like not breaking up with their partner) - give them resources like the above book BUT remember that they know their situation best, don’t act like you or anyone else knows better than they do - don’t talk down to them or act like you would never be in this situation - if they have kids, assume that they are a competent parent - don’t pressure them, just make suggestions. Do the opposite (not just say the opposite) of what the abuser does and they will notice the difference
queer authors: make all your characters queer. every single one of them. leave no room for alternate cishet interpretations. make straight people uncomfortable. let them cry about how unrealistic it is that no one is cishet. bottle…
We live in a society that’s sexist in ways it doesn’t understand. One of the consequences is that men are extremely sensitive to being criticized by women. I think it threatens them in a very primal way, and male privilege makes them feel free to lash out.
This is why women are socialized to carefully dance around these issues, disagreeing with men in an extremely gentle manner. Not because women are nicer creatures than men. But because our very survival can depend on it.
MARY FUCKING SHELLEY. ’oh, i’m a nineteen year old female in a world where females are basically valued only as mothers, grieving over the loss of my child, disowned by my father, in dire financial straights, stuck in a country that’s not my own, ignored and cheated on by my husband, and belittled by my husband’s friends? how am i going to deal with this? WHY DON’T I COMPLETELY CHANGE THE RULES OF LITERATURE, MOTHERFUCKERS? AND WHILE I’M AT IT, I’LL SIMULTANEOUSLY INVENT AN ENTIRE NEW GENRE, AND WRITE THE FIRST NON-RELIGIOUS CREATION MYTH.’
traditional chinese is an actual written language used by millions of people, not symbols to be thrown around at the whim of set designers because they look cool and idk, serves to create a menacing asian atmosphere. this is so disrespectful, and made even worse by the fact that this film in set it taipei, taiwan where the official written language is traditional chinese.
it doesn’t matter that this film caters to a primarily “white” audience who won’t be able to read it, the language and culture of taiwan isn’t something for you to twist and use as you deem fit because it’s “exotic.”
lucy shoots a guy for not being able to speak english.
she l i t e r a l l y shoots this taiwanese taxi driver, in taiwan for not being able to speak english. she’s in taipei and she’s shooting people as they are of no use to her because they don’t speak english.
just think about the sort of message that’s sending out. she’s not being “bad-ass strong female character who takes no shit,” she’s saying that english is useful and better. this is the type of harmful ideology that stretches all the way back from when western countries were colonising and forcing their language and customs on other countries.
let me explain with a real life example. i was born in new zealand to two taiwanese parents. i am fluent in english, but mandarin is conversational at best. my friends in taiwan say that i am “so lucky” to speak fluent english, when they are fluent in mandarin and their english level is no worse than my mandarin. they tell me that they want to perfect their english but in the same breath tell me that mandarin isn’t worth perfecting because i have english and that’s “enough”. they also tell me how pretty my white friends are when they see pictures.
this is the type of neo imperialism ideology that they’ve grown up buying into. it honestly hurts and frustrates me that they belittle their own culture like this, honestly believing that the western world is superior. this is the type of neo imperialism ideology that this film (hopefully unintentionally) promotes: white people are better and will save the day.
if they wanted to film a movie about a white women getting back at those who had violated her, why not film it in a western country? if they wanted to film it in taiwan, why not find an asian lead actress?
i do agree that we need more women protagonists in action/superhero movies, but not like this. its not okay that the female lead needs to be kidnapped and have her body cut open without her consent in order to gain her powers, and those said those powers do not make any of this racist bullshit okay.
i am just so tired and angry of poc always being brushed off to the side as either props or villains in mainstream media.
as a poc, it’s so frustrating to see that the of the standard of beauty still white women when we live in multi-cultural societies and a diverse world.
feminism is about equality. a film in which poc are presented as evil and inferior before being killed off by a superior white woman does not promote equality.
homophobia is not an opinion. transphobia is not an opinion. ableism is not an opinion. racism is not an opinion. these things just make you a bad person and you can’t defend them at all. i don’t want to talk to you if you think these things are okay, and i don’t care about your feelings if you’re upset that i’m mad at you for these things, because you obviously don’t care about the feelings of the people affected by it.